Irving Texas really outdid itself in the “Who is the Biggest Moron In Texas” contest this week when the derptatoes at MacArthur High School decided to call the Clownshoe Police on a suspicious 14 year-old “mooslim” student for inventing a clock. Budding engineer Ahmed Mohamed — who makes his own radios and repairs his own go-kart — hoped to impress his teachers when he brought a homemade clock to school but he failed to realize the sheer breadth and depth of stupidity in Texas.
In most schools, when a talented student demonstrates a propensity for academic achievement, most administrators would heap praise upon that kind of excellence. If a student brought in say, a clock that they made by hand using a variety of electronics, you might put it on display if you happened to have an IQ that scored in the domesticated animal chart but this is Texas and Ahmed is a brown-skinned Mooslim that was prolly planning another 9/11 attack against Murika! Maybe that’s why they called even bigger dunces in to interrogate Ahmed.
Instead of listening to what the boy had made, the 14-year-old took a trip in handcuffs to juvenile detention. His clock now sits in an evidence room. Police say they may yet charge him with making a hoax bomb because that would make this situation a lot better and teach that uppity boy a lesson by getting him a felony conviction even though he told everyone who would listen that it’s a clock.
In the meantime, Ahmed’s been suspended, his father is upset and the Council on American-Islamic Relations is once again eyeing claims of Islamophobia in Irving.
Ahmed showed the clock to his engineering teacher first thing Monday morning and didn’t get quite the reaction he’d hoped for.
“He was like, ‘That’s really nice,’” Ahmed said. “‘I would advise you not to show any other teachers.’”
When the principal and a police officer pulled Ahmed out of sixth period, he suspected he wouldn’t get it back.
They led Ahmed into a room where four other police officers waited. He said an officer he’d never seen before leaned back in his chair and remarked: “Yup. That’s who I thought it was.”
That’s completely and totally not racists.
Ahmed felt suddenly conscious of his brown skin and his name — one of the most common in the Muslim religion. But the police kept him busy with questions.
The bell rang at least twice, he said, while the officers searched his belongings and questioned his intentions. The principal threatened to expel him if he didn’t make a written statement, he said.
“They were like, ‘So you tried to make a bomb?’” Ahmed said.
“I told them no, I was trying to make a clock.”
“He said, ‘It looks like a movie bomb to me.’”
“It could reasonably be mistaken as a device if left in a bathroom or under a car. The concern was, what was this thing built for? Do we take him into custody?”
Of course you take him into custody! You’re in Texas by God and you can’t let no ISIL Infiltrator bringing bombs to school and what is a police officer supposed to do? Give a Mooslim a lolypop with 3000 dead Americans on 9/11?! Police led the 14 year-old suspected terrorist Ahmed out of MacArthur about 3 p.m., his hands cuffed behind him and an officer on each arm.
The police sent him out of the juvenile detention center to meet his parents shortly after taking his fingerprints. They’re still investigating the case, and Ahmed hasn’t been back to school. The principal suspended him for three days for making an electronic device that scares white Christians.
“He just wants to invent good things for mankind,” said Ahmed’s father, Mohamed Elhassan Mohamed, who immigrated from Sudan and occasionally returns there to run for president. “But because his name is Mohamed and because of Sept. 11, I think my son got mistreated.”
Irving Mayor Beth Van Duyne became a national celebrity in anti-Islamic circles, fueling rumors in speeches that the religious minority was plotting to usurp American laws and outlaw bacon right before they implement Sharia law.
“We’re still investigating,” she said, “but it seems pretty egregious.”
Sure you are Beth, you just don’t see what’s actually egregious here you vapid twunt!
Ahmed vowed never to take an invention to school again.
Hang your head in shame Texas! Make sure to leave a comment on the MacArthur Highschool Page.