Obama Skewers Trump — He Will Shut Down Guantanamo, He Knows How To Run Waterfront Property Into The Ground’ (VIDEO)

At last night’s White House Correspondence Dinner, President Obama took to the stage for his last ‘roast’ routine. He certainly did not let it go to waste. Several minutes in, he turned his attention to the current POTUS race. He had fun with both sides. On the democratic side, Bernie Sanders was in attendance, and Obama had some fun with him (see video below) telling the Vermont Senator that he ‘looked like a million bucks — or, in terms he could understand, like 37,000 donations of 27 dollars each.’

Obama went on …

A lot of folks have been surprised by the Bernie phenomenon, especially his appeal to young people. But not me. I get it. Just recently a young person came up to me and said she was sick of politicians standing in the way of her dreams. As if we were actually going to let Malia go to Burning Man this year. Was not going to happen. Bernie might have let her go. Not us.

I am hurt though, Bernie, that you have been distancing yourself little from me. I mean that’s just not something that you do to your comrade.

Bernie’s slogan has helped his campaign catch fire among young people. ‘Feel the Bern.’ ‘Feel the Bern.’ That’s a good slogan. Hillary’s slogan has not had the same effect. Let’s see this. <image of a boulder on a hill with the slogan “Trudge up the Hill”>

Obama went on to have some more fun with his former Secretary of State, comparing her to a ‘lost’ relative who just signed up on facebook and isn’t quite ‘hip’ enough to understand it.

Look, I’ve said how much I admire Hillary’s toughness, her smarts, her policy chops, her experience. You’ve got admit it though, Hillary trying appeal to young voters is a little bit like your relative who just signed up for Facebook. ‘Dear America, did you get my poke? Is it appearing on your wall? I’m not sure I’m using this right. Love, Aunt Hillary.’ It’s not entirely persuasive.

Obama saved his best lines for the GOP, however. Before taking on the candidates, he roasted RNC chairman Reince Priebus;

GOP chairman Reince Priebus is here as well. Glad to see that you feel you have earned a night off. Congratulations on all your success, the republican party, the nomination process. It’s all going great. Keep it up.

On the candidates, Obama made short work of Ohio Gov. John Kasich, saying he hadn’t polled well enough to earn a joke and just showed a picture of him eating a sandwich that went viral earlier this month that has the former Governor taking some very ‘large bites.’

On Ted Cruz;

And then there’s Ted Cruz. Ted had a tough week. He went to Indiana. Hoosier country. Stood on a basketball court and called the hoop a basketball ring. What else is in his lexicon? Baseball sticks? Football hats? But sure, I’m the foreign one.

But of course, the best zingers of the night were reserved for ‘The Donald;’

Although I am a little hurt that he’s not here tonight. We had so much fun that last time, And it is surprising. You’ve got a room full of reporters, celebrities, cameras. And he says no. Is this dinner too tacky for the Donald? What could he possibly be doing instead? Is he at home eating a Trump steak, tweeting out insults to Angela Merkel? What’s he doin’?

The republican establishment is incredulous that he is their most likely nominee. Incredulous. Shocking. They say Donald lacks the foreign policy experience to be president. But in fairness, he has spent years meeting with leaders from around the world: Miss Sweden, Miss Argentina, Miss Azerbaijan.

And there is one area where Donald’s experience could be invaluable and that’s closing Guantanamo because Trump knows a thing or two about running waterfront properties into the ground. Alright, that is probably enough. I mean I’ve got more material. No, no, no.

I don’t want to spend too much time on The Donald. Following your lead, I want to show some restraint. Because I think we can all agree that from the start he’s gotten the appropriate amount of coverage befitting the seriousness of his candidacy. Ha. I hope you all are proud of yourselves. The guy wanted to give his hotel business a boost and now we are praying that Cleveland makes it through July. Mmm mmm mmn. Hmmm.

When he was all done having fun with the Washington crowd including a video of him and John Boehner enjoying post – Washington ‘freedom’ Obama did exactly what he should have done …dropped the mic and walked away.

Well done, Mr. President. The next commander in chief will certainly have a tough act to follow.

Check out Obama on the Democrats HERE:

And the GOP HERE:

See the complete 32-minute speech HERE:

 

Featured image via screen capture from youtube.com

 

 

About Sean Conners 720 Articles
Sean Conners hails from the hills of Pittsburgh where he was weaned on The Steelers and Iron City Beer. He now lives in Delaware with his wife, 3 boys, 4 cats and 1 dog. When he’s not agitating tea people and other extremists (of all ideologies), he enjoys bad television shows, losing at video games and listening or playing as much music as humanly possible. An independent voter and former GOP office holder, Sean makes it his mission to spread truth and smash myths.