“Constitutional” Republicans Flush Your Rights With Their New Platform

In preparation for the Republican nominating convention, 112 members of the RNC have been working overtime to craft their 2016 campaign platform.  It’s a direct assault on the 1st, 4th, 8th, and 14th Amendments, children, single parents, the LGBT community, and anyone who isn’t a member of the American Taliban.  Oops, did I just say that out loud?  Well, read on and you’ll see why.

Pornography is a public-health crisis

Thank goodness for the 1st Amendment.  It’s what guarantees that White Supremacists can post anti-Semitic memes and Donald Trump can unapologetically tweet them to millions.  So what happens when free speech clashes with the folks suffering from small…”government?”  The following platform plank:

“Pornography, with his harmful effects, especially on children, has become a public health crisis that is destroying the life of millions.  We encourage states to continue to fight this public menace and pledge our commitment to children’s safety and wellbeing.”

Zika?  Poverty?  Childhood hunger?  Gun violence?  Meh.  But porn!!  Oh we’ve got trouble right here in River City!

But seriously folks, who the hell comes up with this stuff?  No, scratch that, we know the answer.  The same people who brought you the Bristol Palin “whoops I did it again” after-school special to promote abstinence.

Notice how it’s all wrapped up in a frilly “it’s all about the children” bow?  It’s going to be become a common theme.

Pornography is protected free speech.  Period.  So there’s a big giant GOP turd on the 1st Amendment.  Oh, and your right to unzip your, um…files in private is protected by the 4th Amendment.  Oh well.  After all, this is about legislating morality!  Because America is a Christian nation!  That’s why they’ve also proposed to…

Teach the Bible as an Elective in Public School

It would seem that “Establishment Clause of the 1st Amendment” has too many syllables, because Conservatives haven’t stopped trying to legalize prayer in school since it was ruled unconstitutional in Engel v. Vitale in 1962.  This seems to be their newest attempt, under Tony Perkins’ selfishly twisted argument that “a good understanding of the Bible [is] indispensable to the development of an educated citizenry.”

Who is Tony Perkins?  He’s the president of the Family Research Council, which is listed by the Southern Poverty Law Center as a hate group that “makes false claims about the LGBT community based on discredited research and junk science.”  So it should be of little surprise that he also pushed through a plank to…

Endorse Conversion Therapy of LGBT Children

Conversion therapy” purports to change a person’s sexual orientation or gender identity.  It is of absolutely no surprise that Perkins, an ardent supporter of conversion therapy, neatly tucked it into his next plank, to “support the right of parents to determine the proper treatment or therapy, for their minor children.”

Except, it doesn’t work.  That’s not my opinion; that’s science speaking.   Conversion or “reparative” therapy has been thoroughly debunked as fraudulent junk science that constitutes cruel and unusual punishment.  Yep, that’s the 8th Amendment knocking there.  But come on, it can’t possibly apply to what parents do to their kids, right?  Well, just in case, the platform committee also adopted the…

Parental Rights Amendment

The “PRA” was introduced to both the House and Senate in 2009.

Article 1: The liberty of parents to direct the upbringing and education of their children is a fundamental right.

Article 2: Neither the United States nor any State shall infringe upon this right without demonstrating that its governmental interest as applied to the person is of the highest order and not otherwise served.

Article 3: No treaty may be adopted nor shall any source of international law be employed to supersede, modify, interpret, or apply to the rights guaranteed by this article.

The funny thing is that a parent could perpetually abuse or neglect their child, or send them to conversion therapy against their will, and neither the state nor federal government could do anything to stop them.  Don’t forget, this is all to protect the kids, because we love them.  We love them so much that…

Children should be raised in traditional two-parent households.

It’s another values-voter attack on LGBT families, and an inadvertent middle finger to all single parents out there.  The original platform text read “children raised in a traditional two-parent household tend to be physically and emotionally healthier, less likely to use drugs and alcohol, engage in crime, or become pregnant outside of marriage.”

Um…no.  More debunked junk science.  But as Churchill said, “a lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on,” so it serves its purpose just the same.  The final text seems a little softer:

“The data and the facts lead to an inescapable conclusion: that every child deserves a married mom and dad. The reality remains that millions of American families do not have the advantages that come with that structure. We honor the courageous efforts of those who bear the burdens of parenting alone and embrace the principle that all Americans should be treated with dignity and respect. But respect is not enough.”

That’s right, respect isn’t enough.  That’s why the platform continues with a call for a…

Constitutional amendment banning same sex marriage

There’s a common theme running through these planks: legislating morality. And nothing brings in the election dollars from a good old-fashioned ban on gay marriage.

“Our laws and our government’s regulations should recognize marriage as the union of one man and one woman and actively promote married family life as the basis of a stable and prosperous society. For that reason, as explained elsewhere in the platform, we do not accept the Supreme Court’s redefinition of marriage and we urge its reversal, whether through judicial reconsideration or a constitutional amendment returning control over marriage to states.”

Yep, it still uses that same junk science.  And because the GOP doesn’t give a rat’s ass about equality, they could care less that banning same-sex marriage is a violation of the 14th Amendment.  I’m not saying it, the Supreme Court said it in United States v. Windsor.  

Face it: your rights are inconvenient.

John Goldbraith said “The modern conservative is engaged in one of man’s oldest exercises in moral philosophy; that is, the search for a superior moral justification for selfishness.”  And now you can see how far they are willing to go to get there.

 

Featured Image from all4humor.com

 

About Charlie Barrel 169 Articles

Charlie has been writing news, opinion, and spoof pieces on politics off and on since 1994. In between gigs, he’s a stand-up philosopher.

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