A Questionnaire for Republicans

NOW THAT BARACK OBAMA IS ABOUT TO EXIT THE WHITE HOUSE, IT'S TIME TO ASK REPUBLICANS: WHAT HAVE WE LEARNED?

🐘 A Questionnaire for Republicans 🐘

 

~ PART ONE: THE OBAMA PRESIDENCY ~

 

1) Rate the Obama Presidency

A ◻️

B ◻️

C ◻️

D ◻️

F ◻️

 

~ PART TWO: ECONOMY ~

 

1) Who controls the purse strings?

◻️ Congress

◻️ The White House

◻️ The OMB

◻️ Hollywood Jews

◻️ Nobody

 

1b) Who should get credit for the shrinking deficit?

◻️ Republicans in Congress

◻️ Shrinkage

◻️ Mitch McConnell

◻️ George W. Bush

◻️ Anybody but Obama

 

1c) Who should get the blame for an expanding debt?

◻️ Democrats in Congress

◻️ Obama

◻️ Obama

◻️ Obama

◻️ Hillary and Obama

 

2) What was the unemployment rate at the nadir of the Great Recession?

◻️ 5.2%

◻️ 9.8%

◻️ 35%

◻️ What Recession?

◻️ What does nadir mean?

 

3) What’s the unemployment rate today?

◻️ 4.7%

◻️ 10%

◻️ 16%

◻️ 47%

◻️ I don’t know, but it’s Obama’s fault

 

3a) Where did the Dow Jones stand when President Obama was sworn in?

◻️ 7,000

◻️ 9,000

◻️ 12,000

◻️ 15,000

◻️ Over a million, I think

 

3b) Where does the Dow Jones stand today?

◻️ 1,000

◻️ 10,000

◻️ 15,000

◻️ Nearly 20,000

◻️ Didn’t Dow Jones manufacture napalm?

 

3c) Who should get credit for a booming stock market?

◻️ Newt Gingrich

◻️ Paul Ryan

◻️ God

◻️ Grover Norquist

◻️ Trump! Trump! Trump!

 

~ PART THREE: NATIONAL SECURITY ~

 

4) How many foreign terrorist attacks have their been on American soil under the Obama administration?

◻️ None, thanks to our invasion of Iraq

◻️ Too many to count

◻️ Eleventeen

◻️ More than ever before

◻️ This is a trick question, isn’t it?

 

5) Has Barack Obama kept America safe?

◻️ No

◻️ Depends on the meaning of “safe”

◻️ Can’t decide

◻️ I hate this questionnaire

◻️ Attacks in Berlin, Jerusalem and Paris, so no. They’re in America, right?

 

5a) Did George W. Bush keep America safe?

◻️ Yes

◻️ No

◻️ I meant yes

◻️ Who?

◻️ All except for 9/11, which was Bill Clinton’s fault

 

6) Who should get credit for eliminating Osama bin Laden?

◻️ Our generals

◻️ George W. Bush paved the way for Obama, so Bush should

◻️ The SEALs

◻️ The Office of the President, not the man himself

◻️ Osama bin Laden is still alive! I heard it on InfoWars

 

6a) Were you offended when the Bush administration took credit for capturing Saddam?

◻️ Yes

◻️ No

◻️ Maybe

◻️ I can’t recall

◻️ I hate liberals

 

~ PART FOUR: SOCIAL AND ENVIRONMENTAL CONCERNS ~

 

7) Are you a racist?

◻️ Of course not. I know ___ black people and my lawn boy is Mexican

◻️ Depends on what you mean by “racist”

◻️ Only when I’m drunk

◻️ Okay, and sometimes when I’m sober too

◻️ Calling white people “racist” is reverse racism

 

8) How many handguns do you own?

◻️ 1 — 3

◻️ 3 — 9

◻️ 9 — 20

◻️ 20 +

◻️ Not enough

 

9) Is Climate Change real?

◻️ Of course not. There’s snow on the ground today. Duh.

◻️ Yes, Climate Change is real. It changes every few months, you dumbass librul

◻️ I live in Wyoming, so I couldn’t care less one way or the other

◻️ If the Canadians and the Europeans and the Democrats say it is, then no

◻️ The oil industry says it’s a hoax, and they’ve never been wrong before. So no

 

10) What’s your preferred source of hard news?

◻️ Fox News

◻️ Rush Limbaugh

◻️ Breitbart

◻️ World Net Daily

◻️ Pravda

◻️ Warner Brothers Cartoons